You are The Hermit

Prudence, Caution, Deliberation.

The Hermit points to all things hidden, such as knowledge and inspiration,hidden enemies. The illumination is from within, and retirement from participation in current events.

The Hermit is a card of introspection, analysis and, well, virginity. You do not desire to socialize; the card indicates, instead, a desire for peace and solitude. You prefer to take the time to think, organize, ruminate, take stock. There may be feelings of frustration and discontent but these feelings eventually lead to enlightenment, illumination, clarity.

The Hermit represents a wise, inspirational person, friend, teacher, therapist. This a person who can shine a light on things that were previously mysterious and confusing.

What Tarot Card are You?
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It worked! Maybe now I can learn how to do cuts.

Well, Ianto is dead. All the rumors were true, and, as blackbird_song pointed out, people we trusted have lied to us. RTD isn't that big a surprise, but Barrowman and Gareth? They encouraged fans of the relationship by saying that we would enjoy it, and then blindsided us. I haven't seen the episodes yet, but I'll keep the DVDs when they come, because it sounds like the acting and overall production values were outstanding. And maybe his death was artistically necessary. It certainly was foreshadowed enough, going all the way back to "To the Last Man," and rammed down our throats in "The Dead Line." No, it's not the end we sentimental fans wanted; although there could never be a happy ending. I suspect most of us are thinking, "But they could have had a little more time, at least." Realistically, I can't see Jack hanging around until Ianto's hair turned grey either. But it was still too soon!

After I began to get over the shock tonight, I realized that this death was not the first to affect me in such a visceral, almost nauseating, way. (Obviously I get way too involved with my fictional characters). In chronological order, these are the deaths that diminished me:

Henry Blake in MASH. His discharge papers came through and he was going home. After the emotional but joyful goodbyes and happiness for him, the shocker came, even worse than tonight because it was so totally unexpected. I can still see Radar, fighting tears, announcing in the OR that Henry's plane had been shot down over the China Sea, and there were no survivors. It would have been bad but not so surprising to have a character killed during a battle, but to have the happy ending in sight and then snatched away was heartbreaking.

Sonny Steelgrave in Wiseguy, one of the slashiest shows ever, and the one that hooked me as intensely as Torchwood has. In the first place, he was portrayed brilliantly by the late Ray Sharkey, three weeks out of rehab and giving it everything he had. Sonny was the gangster whose mob was infiltrated by FBI agent Vince Terranova, who succeeded all too well in making a place for himself. Not only did he con Sonny into trusting and loving him like the brother he'd just lost, but Vince himself was obviously falling for Sonny. Major conflict and angst here; Ken Wahl was brilliant too. At  the end Sonny knew that Vince was a cop; with the Feds closing in, he looked Vince in the eye, said, "I loved you, man," and electrocuted himself. I remember walking around at  work stunned the next day thinking about it. Ironically, later on Vince and his previously-disliked handler (Jonathan Banks) fell even harder for each other; great slash pairing.

Tosh and Owen, of course. "You're breaking my heart" still chokes me up.

And now, Ianto. I don't even want to think about what that will be like, if I have tears in my eyes just reading the bare facts. And it's not like we were totally unprepared, but I kept finding reasons to discount the rumors. And so I am angry as well as sad. But mostly sad.

For the last couple of days, I've been basking in two delightful TW-related experiences, and eagerly looking forward to the icing on the fairy cake, Children of Earth. After such a long dry spell, it's almost overwhelming to have the radio plays and the culmination of the ask_world game on the same day.

As enjoyable as the radio plays have been, they still add up to just two hours and fifteen minutes, plus however much more time I spend replaying The Dead Line, or at least Ianto's monologue. Gareth is awesome. One of the perks of watching TW has been to see him maturing as a man and an actor. Of course he was a competent professional when he walked onto the set, but his growth has been phenomenal, and his talents are too. And with his beautiful speaking voice, he should be able to make a very good living in between acting jobs. And now he's trying his hand at panto - John must be proud of his role in helping Gareth develop. Barrowman probably functions simultaneously as a role model and an Awful Example; sometimes it's hard to tell them apart.

The ask_world game, on the other hand, is responsible for more hours spent online than I want to think about, and I still missed a lot. If there is anyone out there who hasn't been playing in this particular sandbox, it all started with Jack's advice-column blog, which was very funny on its own; its motto was "I shoot your 21st-century problems in the face." Then a brilliant and twisted mind decided that Ianto needed a blog too, and ask_aboutcoffee was born (without consulting the then-unknown creator of ask_captainjack). These two played off each other the way I would imagine exceptionally brilliant jazz musicians could improvise and mesh together seamlessly. Together they created a world every bit as real as the television canon, with cocky but loving Jack who thinks he's the best boss and boyfriend imaginable, and adoring but commitment-phobic Ianto who lies like a rug (he had been broken by Lisa's death, but Jack fixed him with his cock). From the beginning, both creators welcomed and responded in character to comments from nonplayers who were enthralled by their world. Before long, they were joined by Gwen, Rhys, Martha, the Ninth Doctor, PC Andy, Queen Elizabeth II and her butler, Janet the weevil, and the one who made me laugh most of all, John Hart (oh_doask). I know I've left some characters out (the Time Agency rep, Jenny, who else)? If you didn't already know it, there are some very, very intelligent people in this fandom.

Anyway, I know that the perception of humor is even more variable than perception of beauty, and not everyone would find this universe as hilarious as I do. But even more important than the humor is the warmth and acceptance that people showed each other, not only the regular players, but those of us they came to call their civilians. I was a little hesitant to jump into someone else's game by commenting, but the response was so welcoming that I felt a part of the group in no time. And for that, I want to thank everyone who was involved. It had been decided earlier to end the game before Children of Earth, so a few days ago the entire entourage was catapulted into the 53rd century during a party to celebrate the six-month birthday of the adorably evil flappy-eared beagle Max-Theresa. Goodbye and thank you all!

This is only tangentially related to Torchwood, but I can't let the upcoming 90th birthday of an icon pass unacknowledged: Pete Seeger will be 90 on Sunday.  According to CNN, he performed at the New Orleans Jazz Fest recently with his grandson, and said in an interview:

"CNN: How important is it to have storytelling out there in this day in age?

Seeger: There's always a danger that you let the machine do it for you. And I think what we are going to see in the next few years, is people finding a way they can do something themselves. Whatever it is.

I put it this way: The agriculture revolution took thousands of years, the industrial revolution took hundreds of years, but the information [revolution] is only taking decades. And if you use it, use the brains God gave us, miracles are going to happen. "


I was an undergraduate during the folk revival of the 60s, and his position can't be overestimated; his influence on Baez, Dylan, and others was enormous. To see him still performing is amazing.  He has been a voice for oppressed people all his life, and in recent years has been active as an environmentalist trying to save the rivers of upstate New York.

Here's a link to him singing his sister Peggy's "I'm gonna be an engineer," one of my favorites. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgzl1Sai4Y0

Happy Birthday, Pete! And many more.

A post seems to have been removed and a wrist-slapping administered by the mods - well-deserved. The subject of the post was an attack on GDL's behavior and personal appearance at Hub 2. It was good to see that most responses pointed out that, while he may drink rather a lot by some people's standards, and his language can be rough, he behaves well toward the fans. The general raunchiness is exactly what a lot of attendees seem to want from him anyway. Blackbird_Song, as usual, posted a thoughtful and balanced response; most of what I said was restating her remarks. The only thing I would like to write here and have on the record is that GDL is an extremely talented actor and intelligent man. He is not Ianto, but he has had a lot of input into the creation of Ianto, such as the tears at the end of his segment in Fragments. I also wondered whether maybe the drinking and language are an attempt to distance himself from the character. Con appearances are public performances, after all, and there's no reason to assume that GDL on stage in front of screaming fans is the same man you'd meet one-on-one over a couple of beers in a pub. Maybe he doesn't want to be typecast as the prim and proper butler type; he has already shown that he can be that, and that he can be a kickass field agent, and an emotionally vulnerable but enormously caring man.  Now he's showing us the raunchy rock musician persona.

The OP's other complaint was that he has put on weight and wears ugly hats, I believe. Feh.

Well, I'm going to start with some random and disjointed thoughts, as I get used to using the computer instead of a yellow pad and black pen. Was watching excerpts from "Cyberwoman" on Youtube and noticed two points: Jack did not force Ianto to execute Lisa, despite his threats, and the rest of the team did not allow Jack to bear the full responsibility, as I'm sure he would have done. They stood together as a firing squad; if Jack had acted alone, Ianto could never have forgiven him. That scene reminded me of the bit in Wiseguy, when evil accountant Sid has taken Frank's ex-wife hostage and Frank is standing by with the rifle to take him out. Vince offers to take the shot for him, knowing that there would be no hope of a reconciliation if Frank kills him in front of her. Frank knows it too, but loves Vince enough to refuse, saying "You're already carrying enough." How warped is that, when the best way to express love is to offer to kill for the beloved.